and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
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