did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
