my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Randomize