Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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