i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I supernannyed him into submission
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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