i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
