u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
