Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize