Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
