Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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