how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
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