i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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