Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize