How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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