she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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