No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
