How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
