did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
She's the barista slut.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
