OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
