He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen