Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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