Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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