Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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