Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
