Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize