sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Randomize
