Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
nutella sex= disaster
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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