the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
