I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Randomize