have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
