guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
