no. you can't hotbox the world.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
