This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
