no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
