i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
