Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
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