I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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