She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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