We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
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