what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
