remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
he fucked my hip out of place.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
