love makes seman taste better
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
