I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
You ruined the universe
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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