watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
