I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
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