I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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