you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
