Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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