You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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