i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize