I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
i now understand why vodka
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
